Prayer for Healing… Fail?

Here is a powerful story of how our writer, Ed, learned an equation that most find difficult to accept: Failure + Faith x Perseverance = Success. Sometimes we are so fixated on doing what is “right” or what we believe is pleasing to God that we overlook the greater purpose: Bringing Him joy. Then, when we wonder why our good deeds aren’t acknowledged, God reminds us that it isn’t about us. The fruits of our goodness will stir change, but we must have faith, patience and perseverance.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-5 NIV)

A lot of times we see and hear about amazing testimonies of God. What we rarely hear about is the journey that got them there. One day I was on the subway praying and asking the Lord for an opportunity to see somebody healed. I’d watched a lot of testimonies from Bethel Church and wanted to see it firsthand. After I finished praying the subway reached my station. The doors opened up and low and behold, a girl in a wheelchair with a cast on her leg was sitting outside.

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I stepped out and stood in complete shock at how quickly God answered my prayer. Completely paralyzed by fear, I didn’t know how to approach the situation. I was dumbfounded and as I processed the situation, the girl and a guy pushing the wheelchair went their way. 

After they were gone, I was really discouraged by my lack of faith and felt like I had just let God down. God set me up perfectly to pray for a girl to be healed, but I didn’t do my part. I left the station and got on the bus to get home. On my way home, I decided that I was not going until I prayed for someone. On the way home, the busy passed by a hospital and I got off. Walking into the lobby, again I saw another man in a wheelchair who also had a cast on his leg. I sheepishly walked right passed him into the hospital as he rolled by. Sitting in the lobby of the hospital, I was so frustrated again and wondered why I was scared. I prayed and prayed and finally gathered enough courage to go and pray for the man. Going back outside I saw him from a distance sitting outside smoking a cigarette. 
After buying a drink at Starbucks, I stood next to him and pretended that I was waiting for someone. 10 minutes or so went by before I finally asked him what happened to his leg. It went something like this.


Me: Hi… What happened to your leg?
Poor bystander in wheel chair: I got into a bike accident.
Me: Does it hurt?
Poor bystander in wheel chair: Yes. 
—- Awkward silence- Another 5 minutes go by. 
Me: Um do you believe in miracles? Because I do. 
Poor bystander in wheel chair: Uh.. sure. 
Me: I believe that God can heal people. 
Poor bystander in wheel chair: Okay, I believe that people heal over time. 
Me: Yeah, but I think God can heal you right now. 
Poor bystander in wheel chair: (Grin)
Me: Can I pray for you????
Poor bystander in wheel chair: No
—- Awkward silence. As the two of us sit there, I tried to rescue the situation but all is lost. Another 5 minutes go by. 
Me: Can I assist you and push you somewhere?
—- The man rolls away in his wheelchair.

Completely humiliated I walked home in defeat, feeling as though I wasn’t holy, “anointed” or gifted enough. I said to myself, “This isn’t for me.” I even said something along the lines of, “I am not Jaeson Ma…”
As I kept kicking myself and complaining, the Lord spoke to me. He gently showed me that it isn’t by my strength that people are healed. It isn’t because of how “clean” or how pure I am that God uses me. It isn’t by ANYTHING I can do. It is purely by His grace and my faith in Him. That day the Lord broke away the lies that put so much pressure on myself to perform the impossible.
A few weeks later, I met a brother in the church who had already actively been seeing people get healed and walking in God’s anointing. I talked to him and asked if he could show me how he prays for the sick. We went out onto the streets and this time I saw how differently he approached people. The way he talked to strangers and the compassion he had was so authentic. It was so casual and natural. This brother even shared testimonies with people on the street and encouraged them that God wanted to heal them. 
Since that time, I’ve prayed for dozens of people on the streets and seen many of them get healed. What I’ve learned is that when we take risks and fail miserably, we have the opportunity into walk into success or doubt and become jaded. God is much more concerned with our character than he is with our comfort. 
How badly do you want to see God heal someone? Will you be discouraged and give up after praying for a few people? I encourage you to proceed as breakthrough is right around the corner. Seek and you shall find, ask and you shall receive.

Featured Reader: Azadeh from Copenhagen, Denmark

From time to time, we’ll be featuring some of the best comments and feedback we receive from some of our readers around the world.  We recently received this message and testimony from our reader Azadeh from Copenhagen, Denmark.  Please keep her and her potential mission trip to Cambodia in prayer!  Thank you to all our readers for continuing to inspire us and for sharing how this blog has moved you!

I turned 30 in November of 2010. With this came a lot of fear about what I would do after graduation, where I would live and what career path I would take. I told a friend about my fears and we started to talk about my future job. I did not know what I wanted to do. That was when I was asked, “If you could do anything, what would it be?” I answered, “I would like to get out, travel and do missionary work.” This was after watching the movie “1040” by Jaeson Ma and reading a tweet of his that said: “Fear looks, Faith Jumps.” Without telling my friend about the motivation behind my desires, she suddenly told me: “I have only one word for you: JUMP.”

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The Harvest from Patience Suffering

When I finished college, I was a mess. Don’t take me wrong…I was a pretty good girl, but had my own sets of problems. I just was searching for more. After graduation, I found a job where I still work, ended up moving out of my crib and started life. 

Two years after I started my life as an adult, I finally got plugged in. I found a spiritual community that I could rely on, which was just the beginning. Things with my immediate family stay still and so did my work. 

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Now, if you really think about it, work consumes a lot of a human being’s time. 5 days a week, 8 hours a day, and not to mention, seeing the same people (more or less) for this amount of this time. A lot of what makes work has to do with the people who work there and around you. I know, for me, I never really cared to make friends at work. Well, actually, I did at the care beginning, but I realized that everything had to do with politics and that didn’t fly with me. So I did my work, but withdrew from the social aspect of work. Because of this, I think my coworkers saw it as a “I’m better than you” type of attitude and in return, withdrew even more from me (not that they made an effort to include me on things nor did I really care), which actually stuck with me from the beginning. 

I used to wonder why God put me in this place. What did He want to show me? I thought about finding a new job several times since I’ve been here, but I realize that this was God’s way of building my character. In addition, I thought ‘God gave me this job, so isn’t it my responsibility to steward it?’ 

A few months ago, I actually befriended one of my coworkers who turned out to be a Christian, as well. In the time that we’ve gotten to know each other, I realized that she was in a similar work situation as me. One day, she told me she was fasting so that God would bless her with another year. That alone was so encouraging to me, which then led me to ask her whether she wanted to start a Bible study at work. She excitedly agreed and that’s when it hit me. God not only was building my character, but He put me here to spread His presence in the workplace and also to support and have fellowship with my coworker. Since we started our Bible study, God has been even more present in both of our lives and at work. 

So, remember the other coworkers I didn’t get along with whom I mentioned earlier? You will not even believe me when I say this, but starting last week, God told me to pray in the four corners of my office room. Since I’m usually one of the first people at the office in the mornings, I did just that and for the four other people who I share the office with. God is so amazing in the way He works; He’s been moving in my office and the relations among the individuals in my department are unbelievably better, except I believe it. I totally feel a sense of peace. 

Let’s go back to my very first statement about being a mess after college. In my development as an adult, not only did I find myself in God, but He also transformed my life and gave me a renewed heart. He has given me more joy in life, helping me laugh and be appreciative. My friends and even my family have told me that they have seen a change in me and I know that’s the Holy Spirit. There are so many ways that God has moved in my life within the last 2 years alone. I gave up the messy life that shadowed me from college, I lifted my burdens at work to Him and I finally gave up my family issues to Him. In all of this, I was reminded of James 4 where it talks about Patience in Suffering and Ecclesiastes and it’s all worth it. This life is temporary and even though we may put importance in various things, everything is meaningless. God totally gave me a fresh start this year with the utmost exuberance and vitality to bring His kingdom down here on earth. It’s only a matter of time before we go home to spend eternity with our Father and I can’t wait.