Food For Thought- What Does it Mean to Give?

All of us struggle with giving in our own way. Some give out of their means, others can’t fathom the idea of gifting.  Regardless of your stance on this issue, always remember that God gave us a priceless gift: the life of His only son. We should all embrace that to give in God’s eyes is to shed ourselves of worldly expectations.  Hopefully this will be in our hearts as we enter the Christmas season. 

With Christmas around the corner, many of us find ourselves making more trips to the mall and perusing more Holiday catalogs in a week than we otherwise would in a year.  Although all of this is done with loving intentions and in good spirit, we have to be careful because too much fixation on the gift itself could lead to an expectation for something in return. 

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Gifts are one of my love languages.  I love giving gifts that are carefully thought out and crafted to cater to the likes of the recipient.  As a result, Christmas gives me the chance to shine.  I recently learned the ugly side of my gift-giving obsession: expectation.  I pre-planned (and planned again) this year’s Christmas presents for my loved ones.  Because God has given me so much this year, I went a little overboard with my choices.  I spent so much time and effort planning, research, saving, making calls, organizing and reserving that I almost burnt myself out the first week, but I was glad to do it because I knew how much it would mean to the recipients.  Long story short, when faced with the reality that not everyone feels as passionate about giving, I felt cheated.  I felt cheated not because I had dedicated so much of myself to create these “perfect” gifts and society’s reluctance to follow suit on these “extravagances” made me feel undervalued, but I felt cheated because I placed too much emphasis on the gifts themselves rather than on the importance of the people I was giving to.  In other words, I cheated myself.  It isn’t that I expected something of value in return, but what I expected was acknowledgement and gratitude for my good deeds, a stamp of approval, the label of a good person, and to set precedence for what constitutes generosity.  What I failed to realize is that I was wrong to impose this type of condition on others- I need to give without expecting any sort of appreciation, praise or stamp of approval … that is the true meaning of giving.

You see, when we spend much of our time, efforts and energy on pleasing others, we can’t help but expect something in return.  Whether you expect a simple “thank you” or an affirmation of appreciation, we all like to know our kind deeds aren’t taken for granted.  However, if we place too much emphasis on the gift itself, as opposed to the recipient’s joy in receiving it, the result gets murky.  God teaches us to give without expectation of return- He teaches us to give unconditionally.  When God sacrificed His only son for our sins, did He set conditions and restrictions on this perfect act of kindness? No. What gift could we ever give to match God’s gift of His child’s life? Nothing even comes close and nothing ever will.

In conclusion, as we approach this gift-giving season, please try to remember the true meaning of Christmas:  to give in God’s eyes is to shed ourselves of worldly expectations.  Father, thank you for this beautiful reminder.